Back in the Saddle…

It has been an interesting 20 days since I wrote an essay. I had a dream to chase and a god size slap in the face. Sometimes, embarrassment is the name of the game. I am learning to accept it and move on.

Let’s take a look at that, being ridiculous. So the past week has been a test of my mistakes and assumptions that have come to blow up spectacularly. And I am talking, blink and you miss it size oversights that make people killer avalanches of issues in moments. But I can only hint at it. I am still worn out from all of it.

So I am behind like 24 essays and I have to keep this habit of public writing for my own sanity. It is necessary even when no one is watching or if I am exercising my consistency with anyone but me. So let’s begin writing about how a habit can be replaced when you are not driven by that first crush haze.

I have always loved writing. It is the magic of storytelling that gets me. I think one of my earliest memories is being read the Disney version of the Cinderella story. It was both parents in a rotation that either read it to me and my sibling. I recall the size of the book and being enamored with the various shades of blue the artists used. I admired how Cinderella endured all she went through and never let it change her approach to humanity. It is often overlooked as a power to people. That soft endurance of bending with enemies while staying the same. It is probably why I enjoyed the Kushiel series by Jacquline Carey or the Dragonsong trilogy by Anne McCaffrey.

It is a fine line between accepting a situation and embracing the situation. The women in these stories accepted. They used their wits to make the most of what was either forced on them or they walked into willingly. I valued the lessons they gave me as it influenced what I went through the past week. It reminds me of how important knowing your self worth is.

So establishing your value system is important not solely for trying times but for your everyday practices. To quote Alice Smith, “I won’t break…”

And neither should you.